Getting it Right
by writingmom
Summary: Just a little rewrite of the hotel scene in Paraguay.


"You can have him. I just hope he fares better than all of your other various husbands and boyfriends." Harm was doing little to hide his disappointment, which was unfortunately spewed in the form of bitterness. He regretted the statement the moment he said it, but his pride was a driving force that was not easily stopped.

The words stung, but Mac didn't react. There was silence for a moment, and then she threw the covers aside and stood from the bed. She made her way into the bathroom, closing the door. She didn't want him to see her cry. She didn't want him to have any more comments about her. She couldn't stand it. All she wanted was to hear him admit why he had come. Was that so difficult? She had to leave.

She quickly changed into a dress and grabbed her sandals. Harm turned to see that she was grabbing the room key. "Mac—" he wanted to apologize. He wanted to tell her that he had come all that way because he loved her; because he was afraid to lose her, because he couldn't bear the thought of her in danger. At the moment, however, the only words that found him were the wrong ones.

She paid no attention to him, and made her way to the door. "Where are you going?" he asked. 

"Out. I need some air." She opened the door to leave. 

"I don't think that's a good—" his statement was stopped by the look in her eyes. He had hurt her once again. The entire moment, ruined by his stubborn pride.

She shook her head, hoping that the tears were not yet noticeable, and headed down the hallway.

He was right. It wasn't a good idea for her to be out in the streets alone, but life had taken on new meaning since her arrival in Paraguay. Caution was just a word, a subtle suggestion meant for children at crosswalks. Only hours ago she had nearly lost her life. She had heard the screams of death and was moments away from meeting a gruesome fate. And then Harm.

She hadn't allowed herself to think of him, to trick herself into dreaming that he would save her. It wouldn't have been realistic, to think that he could track her down to the remote location, bust the door open and declare his love for her. She smirked to herself at the notion.

But he did find her. He did track her down and he even busted the door wide open to save her. Declaring his love? She shook her head at the thought. She should have known not to expect it, but after all of these years, she couldn't tell herself not to want it.

She continued walking through the streets, taking in the sights and sounds of the nightlife. She walked without purpose, but enjoyed every breath of night air nonetheless. She continued talking to herself, thinking about Harm and about his words. She had to come to terms with this man. While it seemed that his feelings for her were strong, his actions were contradictory, and she lacked the energy to try to decipher them anymore. Life was too short.

A street vendor smiled as she walked by and offered her a flower. She took it in kind. "Gracias." She smiled. She twirled the stem in her hands, thankful for the simple act of kindness. 

She took another step forward and felt a hand on her elbow, guiding her away toward an alley. "Harm?"

He kept walking with her, quickly until there was no one else in sight. He had a look of sheer determination in his eyes. She questioned him silently, waiting for either a tirade or an explanation. He seemed agitated, nervous, even.

He turned her body so that she was facing him, and gently pinned her against the brick wall of the building behind her. She studied his face, looking for a hint of rationale. He removed his hands from her and took a deep breath.

"You're right. I was jealous. And when I'm jealous…it makes me…well, I act like an ass. I'm sorry, Mac. This whole thing…none of it has happened the way that I planned it in my head."

She wanted to say something, to ask what he meant, but he was finally talking and she knew that if she interrupted, it could easily lead to another argument. She was tired of arguing. When he realized that she was giving him the floor, he continued.

"I was scared, Mac. When the Admiral told me that you'd gone missing, I knew I had to do whatever it took to find you. That's why I resigned my commission. I did it because I couldn't stand the thought of you down here, in danger. When I saw you on that table—" he inhaled sharply, clearly reliving the memory of it all. It seemed that for a brief second that tears may have been forming, but he turned his back to regain composure before facing her again.

"Well, anyway, I know it's too late and I know I messed up the moment, but I'm not going to let you just walk away from me again. I came down here on a mission of my own, I guess, so I'm going to finish it. Mac—Sarah—" his breathing became more even and his voice more gentle. He reached out to take her arms in his hands. 

She held her breath in anticipation. "I love you." He studied her face before continuing. "I know it's not the right time or the right place, but we've waited too long. This, this 'thing' with us, it's not going to go away and I'm damned tired of fighting it. Please, Sarah. Give us a chance. Tell me it's not too late." 

She stared at him through the light of the street lamp, trying to form a coherent sentence. Were it any other man in the world, she would have doubted the sincerity. She would have asked for proof, for reasoning as to why she should trust; why she should give her heart to a man when it had only backfired in the past. But this was Harm, and it had been nine years. Nine years of arguing, laughing, fearing, trusting and crying. They had been through more as partners than most married couples endure in a lifetime.

Lines of worry began to form on his face when she said nothing. It was about to break him. "Mac, say something. Anything."

Mac stared at him with a controlled expression that hid the flurry of emotion that was circling inside of her body.

"You love me." She spoke quietly.

He nodded his head, unsure as to where she was going. She cleared her throat and looked up into his eyes. 

"And that's why you came down here."

He nodded again.

"Thank you." She stepped forward with every intention of taking him in her arms. "Thank you for saving my life, thank you for being there for me and—for loving me." It wasn't enough. She didn't want him to twist in the wind, but she wanted him to understand the magnitude of the moment. 

She reached up to place her hands gently on his forearms as he had only moments ago done to her. It was killing him. He had to know. 

"Mac, where do we stand?"

She smiled. "We stand on a street corner in Paraguay, nine years into a relationship that has brought us both happiness and pain. We stand in front of one another laying down all pride and ego, finally admitting that…that we love each other." 

Harm let out a deep breath, but there was the doubt was still evident in his eyes. "Does this mean…are you saying that…"

Mac closed the distance between them and snaked her hand behind his neck, pulling him down to meet her. "It means, that I love you, and I want you to kiss me, Sailor." She leaned up to deliver a kiss that quickly went from gentle to passionate. He pulled her body hard into his own, clinging to her with every ounce of strength that he had, his hands furiously taking in the feel of her beneath. They stumbled back to the brick wall, where Harm eagerly pinned her for support.

"I love you." He muttered between kisses. "So much."

She smiled when they finally broke for air. Neither removed their hands from the other, but steadied their breathing in an effort to process what had just happened.

She was beautiful. He looked her over as if for the first time, stroking her hair and firmly cupping her face as if to make sure she was real.

"I'm so glad you're okay." He whispered.

"I'm so glad you made sure I'm okay." She smiled, reaching up to cover his hands in her own.

"The worst part is over, Mac. From now on, it's just you and me." His eyes were dark and serious.

"I like the sound of that." She pulled him to her for another kiss. "Let's go home."


End file.
